Black Lives Matter

I’m trying to understand and I’m starting to put in the work to understand

• I’ve transferred my money away from Wells Fargo
• I donated to Standing Rock
• I’m reading “Black Faces, White Spaces” for an online book group of women hunters
• I’m reading “The New Jim Crow” for my in-town bookclub
• Billings is buying us two books for a school-based bookclub 
• I marched in Seattle during the silent protest on Friday, June12th. 
• I’m joining groups to discuss anti-racism, I’m following Black leaders, I’m on listservs of multiple Black-led groups. 
• Like I said, I’m putting in the work to understand how to be an ally. 

Eric & Pam

Brooks and I met Eric and Pam on our second trip to Yakobi Island.  They had recently purchased the cabin next to Roman and Pat's.  Both Roman and Pat, as well as Eric and Pam, were to be the last owners of their respective cabins; when they pass, their cabins will be turned over to the USFS.  Eric and Pam are artists who moved out to Yakobi Island, population up to 4, because Pelican, population 85, was feeling too big!  Eric said he made an etching, his art media of choice, that he believed the tourists would love and make enough money to buy the cabin.  He said he did that and then some!

We thoroughly enjoyed our time with Eric and Pam, who were incredibly welcoming, kind, eccentric, and talented.  Eric encouraged Brooks to smash buttercups across his forehead as a naturopathic remedy to bug deterrent.  They both declined to eat the filet mignon we brought out to share with Roman, Pat, and Eric and Pam, citing statistics of beef-inspired maladies.  They had a lovely dog that did tricks and raised chickens.  In addition to etching art, Eric was an incredible woodworker and made small boats by hand, which he used to ferry to and from Yakobi and Pelican.

But living in this cabin had a few discomforts.  For one, the harbor in front of the two cabins was inaccessible at low tide.  Pam had degenerative MS and they needed to be able to leave Yakobi when Pam was not doing well.  Therefore, they parked their boat at a harbor about a mile away.  Eric and Pam put in a log bridge across a salt slough and Eric decorated the log with driftwood branches as a railing.  It is an etching of this bridge that we purchased of Eric's work last fall before leaving Juneau, a piece of Yakobi always with us.

Brooks took this photo of Eric's etching of the bridge and railing he made to assist Pam. Brooks describes this as "This is a print from an etching Eric did that we have on our wall. It is of a log bridge that he built a beautiful railing for which lies over a tidally affected stretch on a path on Yakobi island. The tidal stretch is extremely slippery due to the specific algae that grows there. Since Pam would need to use this forest path to reach their boat quickly when she got ill, Eric worked hard to make sure it was as easy as possible for her. At its foundation, this is a true love story."

Well, Yakobi Island is now down to a population of 2 and the USFS has inherited a new cabin.  A few nights ago, we read about their planned deaths on KTOO.  We were immediately saddened that the world lost these lovely souls, but we were also glad that Pam is now free of MS and with Eric for eternity.

KTOO Article.

#Thankful

Reflecting on this past year, I am incredibly thankful for my family and friends I am privileged to have in my life as well as life experiences that continue to push me outside of my comfort zone.  I am thankful for so many people and experiences that they are too plentiful to list.  But some that immediately come to mind which have affected my life in 2018 are as follows:

• I was incredibly lucky to spend nearly ten years with Izzy.  I am thankful for all of our time together, but our last hike in Juneau that included Mt. Roberts to Mt. Olds and out Granite Basin was especially wonderful. I am thankful she passed peacefully in Kodiak.  I am thankful for her loyalty, forgiveness, and unwavering love.
• I am incredibly thankful to have Brooks in my life.  Every year he pushes me towards new experiences, sometimes dragging me and sometimes waving goodbye as I travel a new path of my own.  He pushed me towards my AVI 1 training, he picked me up from my Spring Break backpack trip in AZ and my solo hike around Douglas Island with Izzy, he accompanied me on our first sheep hunt, and he and I are experiencing this new urban space together as we find our new pace in this landscape of cement, noise, and lights.  This man is a friend and a life partner; I am thankful.
• Friends are made through experiences and experiences are much more worthwhile when shared with friends and family.  I have so many people who impact my life in multiple ways.  So thankful for all the fun hiking, camping, backpacking, hunting, sharing meals, sharing drinks, sharing thoughts on books, sharing stories and photos of trips, sharing advice, sharing snow beta.  Thankful for family.  Thankful for friends.   

Losing Izzy

Moving to Seattle this past August, Brooks and I were forced to face a decision we thought was still months if not years down the road: Izzy's retirement years.  We had noticed she was slowing down, unless she was headed downhill in pow-pow, and that her knee was giving her more noticeable trouble, she was taking longer to rebound from trips, and the second day of an overnight she would awake quite stiff.

Winter 2018

Kitchen floor is much cooler than grass in the sun

White Sulphur Hot Springs, Alaska

Ferry to Haines to ski

They loved to snuggle

She loves anything reminiscent of game

Old lady at John Muir Cabin

Berner's Bay spring day

Termination Loop

When we visited Kodiak for opening deer season before we moved to Seattle, we brought Izzy with us to live with my incredible parents for her retirement years.  My parents were excited and welcomed Izzy back into their home with open arms: my dad was looking forward to her rejoining him and Malone on their slower walks and my mom was ready to snuggle.

Summer day during Brooks' Summer Camp 2015

In addition to her right knee that kept her on pain pills, a vet had found a mass in her bladder that left blood in her urine from time to time, and while he couldn't concretely diagnose it other than ruling out cancer and UTI, he put her Science Diet Urinary Care prescription dog food as an extra precaution.

Izzy lived in Kodiak for almost a month and a half, sunbathing in Kodiak's glorious and uncharacteristically great weather, walking, and snuggling, before succumbing to her illness.

I cry now, like I did when I left her in Kodiak, because I feel sorry for me.  I was still processing living in Seattle without Izzy for the past three weeks when news came of her passing after a long day of teaching followed by a school community dinner and a long commute that had me home at 9pm.  I miss her.  And believe it or not, I miss finding dog hair all over every god damn thing in the house.

Portland Pup!

Part of me thought that when I said goodbye to her in Kodiak, that it might be a final goodbye.  Her face continued to whiten and she continued to grow older and frailer.

My mom set up Facetime with us and Izzy just days prior; we talked to her as she lounged in the sun.  And I told myself that when she perked her ears, she knew it was me.

Izzy was a great partner, a loving partner, a trusting partner.  For 9.5 years, she entrusted me to lead her to far corners: Togiak, Portland, Juneau, and multiple mountain peaks in between.  I know she's in doggy heaven doing more sunbathing, running, and chewing on deer carcasses no one can take away from her.

Her usual Lima Bean position

Horizon Lines

        Misadventures Magazine for Winter 2017, a magazine for women who love outdoor adventures, was the first comment on horizon lines that resonated with how I felt about horizon lines.  It stated that "Recent British studies have confirmed that views of the ocean and other slow-moving expanses with horizon lines make us happier than other landscapes. Perhaps it's the feelings of awe and wonder when we look out upon oceans and endless water vistas. Gazing at the ocean is theorized to release a mix of dopamine, oxytocin, and endorphins."  

          Brooks and I have discussed if humans can have landscape imprints the way we have facial imprints.  Why is it that some people are attracted by the mountains, by the dessert, by rolling hills of wheat, or by a horizon line?  There is something visceral about my reaction to looking out at the horizon line.  It's not the same standing atop a mountain and seeing land spread out in all directions, or even thin inlets or straits.  It's the curving line of the horizon.  It keeps me coming back to the shore.

          As every New Year's since my new year in Portland, I select one word to be my theme, my motto for the year.  #oneword2018

This year my word is Horizons.  Where two items meet and blend, looking out, long-range view, new, adventure, excitement.  I'm looking forward to 2018.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/09/KodiakAlaskaAerialView.JPG